Being a mother is truly the greatest calling there is! However, it can be very frustrating at times. Let’s talk about ways for mom to avoid frustration and disappointment by setting clear and manageable boundaries.
As a new mother, home maker, entrepreneur, wife, teacher, and music minister I felt overwhelmed, to say the least. I had to quickly learn how to avoid frustration from my children and keep a harmonious home…if I was going to survive!
Years of experience and guidance from the Lord (as well as mentors in my life) led me to these 7 ways for moms to avoid frustration.
1. Make Boundaries Clear
Clear Boundaries for Children will Avoid Frustration
Children thrive when clear boundaries are made and kept. When boundaries aren’t clear, children act out and become unruly. This is largely do to the fact that they are facing personal insecurities because of the lack of clear boundaries.
I have learned that establishing clear boundaries for my children has allowed them to grow in their confidence as well as made space for myself to avoid frustration and find peace.
unclear boundaries VRS. clear boundaries
|Unclear Boundary||Clear Boundary|
|Mommy is working right now, please try to be quiet!||When you see my office door cracked like this, it means you are not allowed to disturb me. If you don’t have anything to do, grab a game off this table to play quietyly.|
|I don’t understand why you kids always have to argue!||What you just said was argumentative and you are not going to say things like that again. Use kind words while playing or it’s time for you to have some alone quiet time.|
|Mommy doesn’t want you to make a mess.||Here are the things you can play with. Do not touch the things over there or you will make a mess and sit in time-out.|
|Please keep your voice down and no screaming. You are too loud.||Please remember to use your inside voice while you’re inside. You will not scream or get too loud or you will not be able to play right now.|
Clear Boundaries for Mommy’s Work will Avoid Frustration
It is so very easy to blur the line between parenting and working when your a Mom Entrepreneur. I have done this too many times and it only leads to frustration. Remember, clear boundaries are the way to avoid frustration!
You know the boundaries for mommy’s work have been crossed when you find yourself saying these: “Give me just a minute… I’m right in the middle of a something important…I need you to back off and let me work for a second!” to your sweet kiddos.
Nothing is more frustrating for a working mommy than to be bombarded in the middle of an important money making task. The problem lies here – mommy is not at the office…mommy is at home working and taking care of her kids.
SETTING clear work BOUNDARIES for mom will avoid FRUSTRATION
- Set working times and stick to it!
- Put the phone down and be present when reading to or playing with kids.
- Have a designated time each day to do something special (device free) with each kid. This doesn’t have to be a long task, but it will make life easier in the long run.
- Do not work at the dinner table.
- Have a plan in place if work takes over for a bit. Let me explain.. if you HAVE to read that email or answer that call, your kids need to know what to do to occupy themselves until you’re done.
2. Make Boundaries Manageable
First of all, flexibility is necessary for any work-from-home mom. When it comes down to it, mom’s have to put our pride away and “roll with the punches.” That being said, it may take some time to establish some manageable boundaries.
Manageable boundaries are a moving target. I am the first to tell you that what worked yesterday, may not work today. They key is to be consistent, true to your word, and flexible.
Tips for Making Manageable Boundaries
- Remember that the Point is to Avoid Frustration – So… if a boundary is frustrating to you, ditch it and try something else next time.
- If You Set a Clear Boundary, Stick to It – Consistency is key with kids. They will learn right away is mommy doesn’t follow through with her word and walk straight through your boundaries. Set them reasonable, and stick to it!
- Plan Around what Works Best for Your Day – If a boundary such as “after lunch we are all going to do our chores” isn’t working for the youngest one who needs a nap, change chore time.
- Be Prepared to Set Different Boundaries for Different Aged Children – My oldest loves grabbing a book for his quiet time, but my youngest would rather sit with a puzzle. The point is… each is having a successful quiet time within the boundary that I have set for them.
- Give Older Kids the Opportunity to Make Their Own Boundaries – Freedom is a great motivator for kids who want responsibility. When my oldest asks me if he can choose, I always reply “within reason.” He understands that with freedom comes responsibility. Kids benefit from taking ownership of their actions and learn life skills by setting up their own boundaries.
Clear and Manageable Boundaries Will Allow a Working Mom to Avoid Frustration
Please leave a reply below. I want to hear from you!
I have learned over the years of parenting and running my own business from home that chaos can easily erupt without boundaries. Mom’s have to work to avoid frustration every day by setting those clear and manageable boundaries!